John Ennis in new movie

[tjamick]

my brother and i had a recent outing to the theater, where we saw "the village" (absolute shit), but before the feature was a preview for the new film "cellular" about a woman who gets kidnapped and thrown into a room where the capture then goeas on to smash the phone. the woman, who with no prior knowlage of electronics, somehow fixes the phone whick then randomly calls some one. but this some one isn't just anyone, rather a young roustabout on his new camera phone 3000 miles away. anyway, this young lad somehow goes from his west coast bungalow to the east coast in seconds where he goes to try to save the womans son from the same capture. as he arrives at the school, i saw a glimps of the childs teacher played by john ennis.

[3v3+Z]

How 'bout a link so we don't have to go hunting ourselves?

How 'bout I shut the fuck up and give y'all the link my own self?

QuickTime (http://www.apple.com/trailers/newline/cellular/)

Inferior Formats (http://imdb.com/title/tt0337921/trailers)

Hmmm... Doesn't look that funny.

HEY! How 'bout I post a link to a trailer for a movie that's completely unrelated to this thread and this site just because I think it looks kind of interesting and I found it while searching for that other trailer?

Sure. Why not? (http://imdb.com/title/tt0372279/trailers)

[tjamick]

that looks pretty damn sweet. pretty DAMN damn sweet.

[apotatojudge]

The Village was terrible.
I went with some friends to a midnight showing the day it opened, and the theater was packed and as the movie ended it was just people going, "What the fuck?" and being really pissed off.

That weekend people would you greet you, "Hey! Don't go see The Village." and stuff, which I thought was pretty funny. It was even funnier though when I was driving down the highway and someone had written in the dirt on the back of their car "Don't go see The Village." Kind of like a PSA.

-julie.
kiss my grits.

[tjamick]

my brother thought it was good, so i raped him.

[CptPlanet]

Originally posted by apotatojudge
The Village was terrible.
I went with some friends to a midnight showing the day it opened, and the theater was packed and as the movie ended it was just people going, "What the fuck?" and being really pissed off.

That weekend people would you greet you, "Hey! Don't go see The Village." and stuff, which I thought was pretty funny. It was even funnier though when I was driving down the highway and someone had written in the dirt on the back of their car "Don't go see The Village." Kind of like a PSA.

-julie.
kiss my grits.

Congratulations! You just figured out that M. Night Shymalan is the most pretentious hack on the face of the planet and I hope he gets cancer and then cripples himself in a car accident on the way to his first chemotherapy treatment and has to watch his body eating itself alive while his legs hang there like flaccid rotting meatstumps.

I've hated cocksucking one-hit wonder since I saw Signs. And if you've never had the pleasure of watching an M. Night Shyamalan interview, go ahead and treat yourself, because his ego is fucking amazing. He talks about himself like he's writing a biography of Alfred fucking Hitchcock and he just learned to ejaculate a cure for AIDS.

"A lot of people ask me 'Hey M-Night, what's it like knowing that your dick is the only organic structure visible to the naked eye from the Space Shuttle' I just tell them 'Well, it's a lot like a flargle bip ding dang woddly toot toot, and I just try to stay humble about the whole thing.'"

Jesus I want to break his fucking legs.

[3v3+Z]

Originally posted by CptPlanet
"A lot of people ask me 'Hey M-Night, what's it like knowing that your dick is the only organic structure visible to the naked eye from the Space Shuttle' I just tell them 'Well, it's a lot like a flargle bip ding dang woddly toot toot, and I just try to stay humble about the whole thing.'"

The words that actually exist in that statement remind me of something else that I find very interesting that's even further off topic than my previous post in this thread. Looky! (http://www.snopes.com/science/greatwal.htm) (It's not a giant cock or anything like that, by the way. It's completely family friendly and not a joke.)

[RizzleMcIzzle]

Nice use of color by the way.

Did anybody mention Unbreakable yet?

[CptPlanet]

Originally posted by 3v3+Z
The words that actually exist in that statement remind me of something else that I find very interesting that's even further off topic than my previous post in this thread. Looky! (http://www.snopes.com/science/greatwal.htm) (It's not a giant cock or anything like that, by the way. It's completely family friendly and not a joke.)

Snopes is such a great website. I love it when people email me and they're like "HEY DID U NO THAT DURG DEALER IS STUFFNIG DEAD BABBYS W/ COCANE & SNEDING THEM ACROST THE BORDER TO HIDE FROM A COPS? PLEASE SOTP THIS TERIBLE PRACTICE BEFORE ITS 2 LATE BUY FWDING THIS EMALE TO EVERY1 IN UR BUDDY LIST!" and I reply back with a link from Snopes and the warning that if they ever forward me anything again for any reason I will fucking block them and drown them in an above ground swimming pool full of gasoline and human shit.

[tjamick]

i forward all of the chain letters i get to the president.

[CptPlanet]

Originally posted by RizzleMcIzzle
Nice use of color by the way.

Did anybody mention Unbreakable yet?

Yeah, I can understand the success of that movie, because people didn't quite realize what a one-trick pony he is back then, but people going to see Signs and The Village because The Sixth Sense was good is like people supporting the holocaust because Hitler unified Germany.

[RizzleMcIzzle]

I laughed my ass off at that birthday party part! And what about the shocking conclusion where Mel Gibson makes a movie about the last hours of Jesus' life?! Oh man, I never saw that coming!

[tjamick]

"I'm a fuck me a potato judge before I die."

Really?

[CptPlanet]

Strangely enough, M. Night Shyamalan's The Sixth Sense. In particular, the teenage boy in the hallway that says "Hey, come on, I'll show you where my dad keeps his gun." and then turns around and is missing half his fucking head.

It's completely beyond me how someone can make a movie that is the absolute embodiment of perfection in the horror genre, and then spend the next 5 years sodomizing moviegoers with his spike-covered metal beastcock.

The scariest part in any of his movies after The Sixth Sense is when you realize that you're eight bucks poorer and two and a half hours closer to death.

[3v3+Z]

What about "Freaked"?

[3v3+Z]

What about Scooby fuckin' DOO?

[RizzleMcIzzle]

Patrick Swayze was a pretty good ghost.

[CptPlanet]

Oh yeah and you totally tried to throw in too many metaphors when you were insulting my choice in jokes. Or, in your words: That ugly tampon of an insult is drier than a vagina fig's oozing stinkburger cooch.

[3v3+Z]

Originally posted by CptPlanet
That ugly tampon of an insult is drier than a vagina fig's oozing stinkburger cooch.

That's an excerpt from the recently discovered last poem by Jim Morrison.

[CptPlanet]

Hey pal you're about three metaphors away from getting my fist thrust thre thrust into your face.

[CptPlanet]

i don't get it

[tjamick]

and you never will. i hate you. no, i h8 you and know one hates better than pop punkers.

[CptPlanet]

LIFESTYLES OF THE RICH AND THE FAMOUS
THEY'RE ALWAYS COMPLAININ
ALWAYS COMPLAAAAININ

IF MONEEEY'S SUCH A PROBLEM
WELL THEY GOT MANSIONS
THINK WE SHOULD ROB THEM

(ps: please don't rob my mansion it's where i keep the vaults full of blood money given to me by my record company for banging out pseudo-social commentary in the form of poorly constructed novelty songs)

Whoever signed Good Charlotte should have a fucking award named after them that is given annually to the most shining examples of shrewd, cynical capitalism. Kudos are also due to Good Charlotte themselves for their lucrative contract with Lucifer.

[tjamick]

i got arreasted one time for telling little kids i was lucifer and telling them not to smoke. i got yelled at by a parent for swaering at the child and telling him jesus wasnt real, which i didnt do.

[tjamick]

YM? yea i read that but i like dont think its true.

[CptPlanet]

jesus christ you both read YM? you realize that you're either pedophiles or fucking faggots right?

also i got yelled at for calling some four year old a buttcrack for playing on the sidewalk while i was riding my bike. it was hardcore

[CptPlanet]

your free time would be better spent bleeding to death than reading YM. if it ever comes down to it and you have to choose, do the right thing.

[tjamick]

that was a joke.
i figured if the sarcasm was too subtle i'd throw in a "like" but that didnt help i guess.

[CptPlanet]

then i guess i can stop designing this christopher lowell avatar for you.

[CptPlanet]

i've posted like 70 times tonight as well. unfortunately this orgyistic spree of internet tomfoolery is going to have to end soon, because i have to be up in 4 and a half hours and drive to the cocksucking airport to catch a plane.

[tjamick]

i hope you miss your plane

[CptPlanet]

yeah well i hope your mom dies

[agent_PUNT]

"Unbreakable"... ha! more like "Unwatchable"!

Yeee--ooooooowwww!

Now that's a closer!

fart.

[apotatojudge]

Things:

1. Hey! That's not me in those pictures! And how did you guys do that? Whenever I try to post a picture it won't let me... Just makes it a link.

2. 'Signs' is terrible. The whole Christian thing at the end really pissed me off. Maybe M. Night had a badass ending to it but Mel Gibson pursuaded him to change it? Blargh.

3. Uhm. I forgot what else I had to say. I should copy the posts I want to reply to... maybe. Or, maybe I should just stop going out at night so that I can stay upto date and reply when all of you reply?

Oh, yea, I'm NOT going out anytime ever again. I got stood-up. Sort of. Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh.

Wait! Someone said something about Doug Benson, and I'd just like to state that I am madly in love with him. No, no, that's not right.

-SBJ.

[CptPlanet]

Julie tell me about your bras and panties.

[apotatojudge]

What bra and panties??

OOooooooh, hooooo, hoooooooo.

[CptPlanet]

Oh man I love the thought of your dirty breasts sagging all the way down to your distended beergut while your leaky faucet vagina ruins yet another pair of your jeans and ruins the air quality for 400 yards in every direction with an odor foul enough to spoil the ambience of a medical waste dumpster.

[agent_PUNT]

I don't think Cpt can go 3 posts without talking about body parts.

This is a set-up....

[tjamick]

i'll set-up my penis in her cunt.

[CptPlanet]

I'll set up my tripod in her asshole and take time lapse photography of me flinging my cum up into her lower intestine.

[(stupidname)Ed]

have I ever told you motherfuckers that I love you?? I love each and every one of you motherfuckers...can we have a group hug?? Cammm annnn everybody join in for a group huggg!!


ps....this post has nothing to do with the "god hates fags" subject.

[CptPlanet]

Dude no way that's gay. I'll only buttfuck a ho.

[Treebeard]

julie's not a ho.

[CptPlanet]

Well she certainly didn't object to being called one.



















LAST NIGHT. :cool: ;)























On the internet. :(