Jokes about corn

[Stabby]

well look slike the hott dayz of summer are upon us once again americans! that means time for swimmin polls, and summer camps and bowls full of jelly. it also means CORN!
lets hear your favorite jokes about corn here!

mine:
How do you keep corn ON the cob?

A. Give it enCOURAGEment!!

have a good summer friends!!! <3

[AndersLevant]

Man, Stabby, you should move to Ohio! They have the best corn in the world!

[voodoochile]

Because it's a joke about corn does that automatically make it corny?

[ME!!!!]

Why didn't the farmer enjoy jokes about his poops.

Because they're corny!

[fritter]

http://www.jacneed.com/PhotoFile/Ty_Cobb.jpg

[RizzleMcIzzle]

Where does the corn-loving minotaur live?

In a maize.

[ME!!!!]

what roman emperor brought christianity to Iowa?

CORNSTANTIEN.

[ME!!!!]

ME!!!!--Victory over DA FEET

[ME!!!!]

dude, That's in the bible. Learn UP!

[DoctorDelicious]

Some corn walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we dont like your kind in here." The corn pulls out a .357 and pops a cap in his chest. The bartender, with his dying breath, says, "Well, I guess I should have thought about the implications of entering into a racially, or perhaps, vegetably motivated conflict with a piece of enlightened corn, who, also happens to have the necessary documentation to not only purchase a weapon of that caliber, but also to have the brass balls to shoot said weapon into the heart of a human being without remorse." The corn fires two more caps into the bartenders brain, thereby silencing the chatty, now corpse-bartender, and ending the transaction. Later, the corn goes on a shooting spree across the midwest, leaving a trail of bodies in its wake.
Sometimes, after telling this joke, people ask me, "Is there a punchline?" There really isnt, however, there is a clear message for children I tell it to, and that is not to fuck with corn.

[voodoochile]

Originally posted by DoctorDelicious
Sometimes, after telling this joke, people ask me, "Is there a punchline?" There really isnt, however, there is a clear message for children I tell it to, and that is not to fuck with corn.

You should tell that joke to the Children Of The Corn!!! LOLZ

[Occupant]

Why are Chinese restaurants popular among pedophiles?

Because they sell baby corn!

[Pali]

Hey guys, just thought I should let you know that it's summer here too. Here in England during summer we enjoy bbq, riding the underground railway and watching Timecop on DVD.

But anyway, here's my entry for the prize!

Q: Why should you never make important arrangements with a piece of corn?

A: Because corn flakes.

[RizzleMcIzzle]

http://the-op.com/images/shop/cornballer.jpg

[ME!!!!]

Originally posted by Pali
Hey guys, just thought I should let you know that it's summer here too. Here in England during summer we enjoy bbq, riding the underground railway and watching Timecop on DVD.

But anyway, here's my entry for the prize!

Q: Why should you never make important arrangements with a piece of corn?

A: Because corn flakes.

Do they have republicans in england?

[TomWopat]

I Googled "corn jokes" and found this:

http://www.jokez.com/clean/food/corn.html (http://www.lemonparty.org)

[RizzleMcIzzle]

God damnit, I actually fell for it that time! :mad:

[ME!!!!]

Originally posted by RizzleMcIzzle
God damnit, I actually fell for it that time! :mad:

Wait... You're the guy in the picture?

[RizzleMcIzzle]

What? Oh, you mean the guy in this (http://www.lemonparty.org/) picture?

[JamesBradford]

So this guy walks into a live theater producer's office and he says "Buddy, I have got a show that you can't miss. It's amazing." The producer says to him "I don't have all day, let's hear about it."

The guy says:

"So here's the deal. It's a family act, myself and my wife with our twin teenaged daughters, and our newborn baby son.The act starts off when a machine that is springloaded with monkeyshit starts firing lumps of it at the audience every three or four seconds. After the first few splats, my wife comes out buck naked and sits on a chair that has been slathered in butter. She pulls her dress over her head and she's totally naked, but she has a raw ear of corn sticking out of her cunt.

That's when I come on stage, already nude and with my cock rock hard. My wife starts slathering the corn with butter by writhing around in the chair, and I start fucking her in the mouth while reciting various passages from The Koran. At this point our daughters, Betsy and Heather, they come on stage in bondage gear and cradling our beautiful newborn son. We have a special wooden chair built for them that is on a mechanical track so that it revolves in circles around my wife and I, which, by the way, by this point I'm underneath her fucking her ass and working the ear of corn in and out of her snatch.

So my daughters, they're on this special moving chair and they are back to back, and one of them inserts my infant sons head in her ass, the other inserts his legs. So the centrifugal force of the rotation of the chair makes him work his way in and out of their assholes.

Usually at this point Im about ready to come so I pull out of my wife and throw her to the floor. She's knocked unconcious and I throw a match to her hair so that she catches on fire. After a slow roast, the corn in her pussy starts to pop. At this point we have a special guest star, Martika, who comes out and catches the kernals of popped corn with her mouth as they fly out of my suffering, nearly dead wife."

The producer looks at the man astonished. "That is the most horrifying thing I have ever heard of? What in God's name do you call this act?"

"The Aristocrats"

[Pali]

That joke isn't about corn. You lose, buddy!



Originally posted by ME!!!!
Do they have republicans in england?
Why yes we do ME!!!! Here in England we call them Conservatives. I guess you could call the Labour Party our equivalent to the Democrats. Though here in England we have what many would deem a '3 party political system.'*

Unfortunately, the 3rd party is the Liberal Democrats. Meaning we have 2 (supposedly, in the case of Labour) left leaning political parties. In my opinion this is quite detrimental to the political system here, predominantly because this results in a reduced majority for the winning party and therefore less capability to make many meaningful changes.*

In conclusion however, all parties are different enough in terms of policy that they each justify the seperations between them.*


*I know very little about politics.