if you hate jesus you'll love the passion

[fritter]

i rented it for kicks and an honest 2/3 of the movie is jesus getting his ass beat something fierce. if i were going to make a movie about jesus i would probably include some serious philosophy, but there is none to be found. i can't believe jesus didn't fuck monica belucci. that would also be in my jesus movie. there is a completely unnecessary (and awesome) scene where a dude on the crucifix next to jesus gets pecked in the noggin by a raven, which would be the only thing i would steal for my jesus movie. i also determined that the apostles were a bunch of pussiefags. the only cool guy in the movie was the one who helped jesus with the cross, but in my jesus movie he would sabotage the structural integrity of the cross with huge beaver teeth and then save jesus so that there would be no christians today.

[Treebeard]

Originally posted by fritter
he would sabotage the structural integrity of the cross

This made me laugh.

[Rabot]

Some dude in the theater told me I was going to hell cause I laughed so much...you guys don't think he's right...do you?:(

Basicaly, that movie tought us all that the jews are money grubing god hating assholes. Nothing new realy.

[agent_PUNT]

Originally posted by Rabot
Basicaly, that movie tought us all that the jews are money grubing god hating assholes. Nothing new realy.

Mel Gibson isn't Jewish.


haha... but seriously...

I think Jesus was fucking cool, it's Christians I don't agree with. Don't forget Jesus WASN'T a Christian!!!!

Infact if he were alive today... he still wouldn't be a Christian, how fucked up is that. (plenty fucked up)

[NaturesOnions]

Originally posted by agent_PUNT
I think Jesus was fucking cool....

Yeah me too. He's my favorite fictional character.

[agent_PUNT]

Originally posted by NaturesOnions
Yeah me too. He's my favorite fictional character.

Jesus was real, the stories about him weren't accurate. That's all.

the story of David & Goliath is exaggerated, but the guys involved existed and fought.

etc...

[gods_chillin]

Originally posted by agent_PUNT
Jesus was real, the stories about him weren't accurate. That's all.

the story of David & Goliath is exaggerated, but the guys involved existed and fought.

etc... what version are you reading?

[agent_PUNT]

Originally posted by gods_chillin
what version are you reading?

version of what?

Are you referring to Jesus or David v. Goliath?

[gods_chillin]

Originally posted by agent_PUNT
version of what?the bible

Originally posted by agent_PUNT
Are you referring to Jesus or David v. Goliath? i actually have David v. Goliath #1 in my collection.

[JuanBallsac]

Tis I JuanBallsac.

I think Chris Penn should have played Jesus.

By the way, Mi papi's name is JesusBallsac.

[Rabot]

This reminds me of an epsiode of jesus and friends, an animated show on the local christian cable channel, in which thebig noses consipred to get rid of jesus because "we'd loose all our followers, all our power..." and the fat one chimed in "and all our money"

I laughed so hard...I need to watch that chanel more offten...especialy for david and goliath.

[AndersLevant]

Davie and Goliath. Maybe Davey and Goliath.

[RizzleMcIzzle]

Davey and Goliath. Yes, great show. Bibleman has to be the best of all though. I mentioned it once in the Bible thread. He has this black guy with a bazooka-type weapon as his sidekick. One time he beat up these guys and did a little dance.

[Rabot]

is that the one in the bright yellow and purple spandex? He was on that channel to. he was like a christian luchadora or something...

[agent_PUNT]

i have no idea which version of the bible i have looked at...

i am curious about another thing in the bible...

when the first person dies in the bible... aka the first murder ever...wouldn't it be impossible for anyone else to figure out what the hell happened? I mean how would they know the concept of death if they have no reference?

I think I'm missing something... I guess God was there to explain it or whatever.

[NaturesOnions]

Yeah, god was a lot more demonstrative back then.

[RizzleMcIzzle]

Originally posted by Rabot
is that the one in the bright yellow and purple spandex? He was on that channel to. he was like a christian luchadora or something...

Yeah, he quotes the Bible while swordfighting with evil villains. It also involves a lot of kids doing religious performances, like singing songs about God and stuff and dancing to them.

[KyleGassProject]

Well- I finally saw The Passion of The Christ. It was AMAZING!

It made me want to kill Jesus all over again.

Relgious snuff films ROCK!